High Performers Use This Phrase to Build Loyalty Fast

The 3-Word Phrase That Turns Awkward Conversations into Meaningful Connections

"Tell me more."

These three words signal genuine interest, create a reciprocity loop, and leave a mystery gap their brain wants to fill.

When they say, "I'm a teacher," I say, "Tell me more."

They share, "I teach 4th graders."

I follow with, "What's that like?"

Suddenly, we're having a real conversation—not an exchange of business cards.

The Zeigarnik Effect:

Our brains obsess over unfinished stories.

When you respond to their answer with curiosity, they feel compelled to complete the narrative loop—making the conversation memorable.

Always follow "Tell me more" with a why or how question:

"How'd you get into that?"
"Why's that meaningful to you?"
"What's that experience like?"

Pitfalls to Avoid:

• Don't interrupt their response
• Don't use it sarcastically
• Don't immediately shift back to yourself

Phrases That Instantly Build Connection in Any Conversation

"Help me understand..." instantly disarms defensiveness.

When opinions clash, this phrase signals genuine curiosity rather than challenge. The magic happens because you're not disagreeing—you're seeking their perspective first.

"You're right." Stanford research calls this selective validation—acknowledging any truth in someone's position, even if it's just 10%.

This creates a psychological bridge that makes them more open to hearing where you differ.

"What's your ideal outcome here?" transforms arguments by shifting focus from rigid positions to underlying needs.

Using this powerful question can turn a heated negotiation that had stalled for weeks—to a resolution came within a day.

"How can I support you?" beats "Let me fix this!"

A CEO client reported this single phrase reduced her team's burnout complaints by 30%.

Why? It acknowledges capability while offering partnership, not rescue.

"What's your take?" works best when you're the expert. Counterintuitively, surrendering authority builds more credibility.

Trial lawyers use this to transform hostile witnesses into collaborative information sources.

"I need your help." Cornell research found that admitting vulnerability makes others perceive you as more competent, not less.

This phrase triggers the Franklin Effect—people like you more after helping you.

The pause is crucial with all these phrases.

Neuroscience shows a 2–3 second silence after someone speaks triggers oxytocin (the "trust hormone") in their brain.

It's why FBI negotiators use strategic silence during crisis situations.

Partnerships = Leverage on Steroids

They give you two things money can’t easily buy:

a ready-formed audience (faster than building your own)
and transferred trust from someone your audience already knows.

Partnership formats are limitless:

• Cross-sharing social posts
• Linking in blogs
• Podcast guest swaps
• Co-authored content
• Product promotions
• Co-hosted events

The world is your oyster.

The Reciprocity Principle:

Humans naturally want to return favors.

Give generously without immediate expectation,
and watch how often it comes back multiplied.

Don’t be cheap with commissions. 10% is often not enough online.

35 - 50% on your digital products to partners can be totally reasonable.

Why? Because accessing a pre-built, trusting audience is worth it.

Their promotion = your growth. Make sure to pre-calculate this in your margins.

Partnerships multiply your reach without multiplying your effort.

Be generous with attribution and credit.

Always highlight your partner’s expertise and contribution.

The more you shine the spotlight on others, the more others want to work with you.

“No tree, it is said, can grow to heaven unless its roots reach down to hell.” - Carl Jung

Best,

Maxi | The Warrior’s Newsletter